Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i think i have two assholes
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize
