you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
