Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize