Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.