Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
