what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
is wine microwaveable?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
