Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Randomize