I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Randomize
