They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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