When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
