They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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