Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I think I won the penis lottery.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize