I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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