My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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