in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize