I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
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they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
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After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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