That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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