What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
last night I used snow as a chaser
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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