I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
You're a waste of cheezeits
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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