it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
