I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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