How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
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