Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
