Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize