how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Nobody cheats on THIS.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
