Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize