Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
