My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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