I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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