woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
The adults are the big ones right?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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