dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
You can't motorboat a personality
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
