singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
