she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
