Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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