I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
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we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.