I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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