ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I think I am morally bankrupt
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
