Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize