Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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