There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
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