You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Watching her eat just hurts me
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
