im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
