I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Someone signed my nipple.
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