New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I think I sprained my soul last night
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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