I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I have feelings that need drinking.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
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