so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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