That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Randomize
