Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
