Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole' http://tfl.nu/gd5q
  Replies (5) Good night (995) Bad night (553)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd

  (1-808): View more from Hawaii

  lock that shit down

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd (1-808): lock that shit down http://tfl.nu/r4jz
  Replies (31) Good night (7614) Bad night (641)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it. http://tfl.nu/6rsg
  Replies (6) Good night (1425) Bad night (5391)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top. http://tfl.nu/w6ft
  Replies (7) Good night (2221) Bad night (1199)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina. http://tfl.nu/ugq6
  Replies (14) Good night (3215) Bad night (1099)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely? http://tfl.nu/gf43
  Replies (4) Good night (2053) Bad night (1217)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series http://tfl.nu/c4pq
  Replies (13) Good night (3157) Bad night (1010)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks http://tfl.nu/m24y
  Replies (6) Good night (2766) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding. http://tfl.nu/inbb
  Replies (5) Good night (1864) Bad night (641)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  That would warm my breasts.

  (770): View more from Georgia

  In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): That would warm my breasts. (770): In this context breast is a metaphor for soul. http://tfl.nu/yhcf
  Replies (8) Good night (1139) Bad night (452)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (951): Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night. http://tfl.nu/gbx1
  Replies (10) Good night (1008) Bad night (496)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica http://tfl.nu/yubm
  Replies (4) Good night (1079) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew http://tfl.nu/lady
  Replies (4) Good night (1011) Bad night (269)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD. http://tfl.nu/67ij
  Replies (6) Good night (890) Bad night (360)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink. http://tfl.nu/k5ex
  Replies (4) Good night (474) Bad night (325)

Randomize