operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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