there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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